Commentary
By Nick Waller
Being newly early retired and with unlimited goof-off time, I decided to challenge myself to watch all 104 matches of the 2026 World Cup. It took a lot of Monster Energy drinks and coffee to sit through each and every match. My Thornton’s Rewards Card runneth over.
When there were two matches on at a time, I watched the second game on a computer while “the big game” was on the TV. And now that it’s over and I survived, it all seems like a blur.
The World Cup is the most viewed, most analyzed, most over-analyzed, most beautiful and most frustrating sporting event on this and perhaps any planet (change my mind.) It has been a must watch event for me since I made fun of a coworker going to the 1998 World Cup in France.
“Soccer is slow. It’s boring,” I said to my buddy Tad. “Just watch one match,” he replied. I did. Just one. Then another. Then as many as I could. Every four years ever since. The great games hooked me in. But watching the fans, seeing how much it meant to them, brought me back for years.
The World Cup is a quadriennal tournament which has been around since Uruguay beat Argentina 4-2 in 1930. This year 48 teams from powers like France and Spain, to teams I had never heard of like Cabo Verde, battled in the planet’s biggest sporting event.
It’s hard to sum up such a prolonged and intense viewing experience. But as Rick Bozich might say, here are a few thoughts written on the back of my game-used Lamine Yamal jersey.
MEDIA: I am old. I am grumpy. I will be dead soon. I am hypercritical of the media having worked in it since Betamax tapes. I watched the Fox coverage of the World Cup until the United States second match against Australia. It was a group stage match. The US plays three games in group stage, guaranteed. If you play well enough you go to the knockout round. If you lose there you’re out.
So think of the group stage as the World Cup regular season and the knockout round as lose and go home like the NCAA Tournament. In 2026 the US qualified for the knockout round for the eighth time. Keep in mind any of those matches are higher up the food chain then playing Australia in the group stage.
So when Fox announcer John Strong, in a bit of an overreach, hinted pre-match this was the biggest match in team history, I could bear their coverage no longer. I decided it was Telemundo time.
I watched over 80 matches on Telemundo. They spoke at the right times, shut up at the right times and got excited about gameplay at the right times. And I am pretty sure they didn’t say “Brad Pitt among the fans here,” as Fox did during a camera shot of Matt Damon. But I don’t know if Telemundo made the same mistake. Even after many hours of coverage, the only Spanish word I know is Gooooooool!
CABO VERDE: The smallest team population-wise and second smallest ever, Cabo Verde punched above their weight class every match, making the knockout stage in their first appearance. Vozinha, the team’s 40-year-old goalkeeper, had about fifty thousand Instagram follows before the team’s David and Goliath Group Stage matchup with one of the pre-tournament favorites,, Spain.
A Spanish goal seemed a foregone conclusion, but it never happened. Cabo nil, 2026 World Cup champs nil. Vozinha, who went from an unknown to worldwide stardom, now has over 29 million Instagram followers.
SCOTLAND: As one of my favorite teams in the World Cup, Scotland’s flameout in the Group Stage hurt. But any team whose fan base caused bars to run out of beer in every city they visited demand our attention and respect. Well done Tartan Army!
THE THIRD-PLACE GAME: England versus France. Two of the top four teams in the tournament played in the third-place match. Almost nobody cared. Two teams who were one win away and couldn’t get over the line, now playing in a consolation match, all hope for the big trophy gone. But the goals came early and often in England’s 6-4 win. In basketball terms it was like watching Loyola Marymount put up 160 every night in the late 1980s and early 90s.
THE FINAL: Spain one, Argentina nil. In what was likely his last World Cup match, 39-year-old Lionel Messi finally looked old. After scoring an impressive 19 goals in the World Cup, the Argentinian team managed no shots and no shots on goal in 90 regulation minutes in the final. They finished with two extra time shot attempts, neither on target.
Translation: Spain’s goalkeeper did no work that day. The game was marred by a post match fight, fueled by Argentina’s Leandro Paredes who earned a red card for his efforts.
The next World Cup will be hosted by Spain, Portugal and Morocco. I should be caught up on my sleep by then, and I have plenty of time to learn some Spanish. Downloading the Duolingo app now. See you in 2030!
Illustration by George Taylor Jr.
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